In general, you should undertake this huge task during a time when there is little conflict and not much activity. Potty training around Christmas or Thanksgiving can be distracting. You need to devote a lot of attention to your toddler, and with so much going on during the holidays; you probably won’t be able to do that.

However, if you have a long holiday weekend without having to worry about work, working on potty training during this time could be a great time to start.

Make potty training a top priority on a consistent basis when you have the emotional and physical energy to do it. Even if your child shows signs of potty training readiness, you may not be ready for it as a parent.

Clear your schedule and be ready for anything! Select a time to begin the potty training when your family’s routine is least likely to be disturbed with house guests, vacations away from home, a move, and so on. Make sure you’re not pre-occupied with other major commitments such as work, either.
You may want to get out a calendar and talk with your child about a good time to start intensive potty training. ask your child when s/he wants to begin to learn how to use the potty. Circle the date in a bright color and keep reminding her/him that “potty day” is almost here.

Other less-than-ideal times to begin potty training are during stressful situations such as when traveling, around the time of a birth of a sibling, or when making another huge life adjustment for your child such as taking away the bottle or changing from a crib to a bed.

Take these factors into consideration when you plan to introduce toilet teaching. It may be better to postpone it until your child’s environment is stable and secure.

Also, though some experts may recommend starting the process during summer because children wear less clothing, it is not a good idea to wait to start if your child is ready.

Of course, teaching your toddler to use the potty isn’t an overnight experience. The process typically takes between 3 and 6 months, although it may take more or less time for some children.

And although some little ones can learn to both make it through the night without wetting or soiling themselves (or the bed) and use the potty around the same time, it may take an additional 6 months to 1 year to master staying dry at night.

There are some people out there who will offer “systems” that can help you teach your child to use the potty within three days – or even less. They may help, but potty training is a long, learning process that takes complete dedication.

Children can experience stress too. Trying to potty train while your child is under a certain amount of stress for whatever reason can be frustrating for both of you. Avoid this huge step during times like this.

Toilet training is a learning process, not a disciplinary process, and a complicated one at that! Your child has to understand what you want, and then has to learn how to do it. In addition to understanding the bodily sensations, getting to the bathroom and getting clothes off, a child must first constrict sphincter muscles to achieve control, and then relax them to eliminate. Obviously there is a lot to learn. Gaining bowel and bladder control is a skill and fortunately children usually like to learn new skills.

The mastery of skills usually follows a pattern. First is bowel regularity often followed by bowel control. Daytime bladder control often comes next but for many children this can happen simultaneously, and finally later (often much later), comes nighttime bladder control.

And, of course, there are children who achieve daytime and nighttime control simultaneously. With the swing toward a more relaxed approach to toilet training from the previous generation, children tend to be trained later and more frequently their bowel and bladder functions come under their control at the same time.

Some parents elect to take a more laid-back approach towards toilet training. They let the child go when they want to and if they have an accident, they just gloss over it with little reference. For some people, this can work, but it’s bound to take a lot longer than traditional toilet training.

If you do choose a passive, more laissez-faire attitude about toilet training, keep in mind that children still need to know what it is that is expected of them. You are not necessarily “pushing” your child by providing direction and expectations. Some children really are ready to be trained early, so you are not “pushing” if you are meeting no resistance. Let their resistance be your guide. Children really do love learning grown-up behavior, so don’t deny them their opportunity, if it fits their readiness.

So, are there ways you can help along the process? You bet!